little bits...
I couldn’t take my eyes off of her tattered white bra strap poking out from her shirt. It told me so many things about her that were probably untrue.
I hope everyone has enjoyed their “worship the dead” weekend. Memorial Day was originally intended to honor the fallen soldiers from both sides of the civil war. Later it was broadened to include veterans of all wars. I am close to only one veteran. My father served a tour in Vietnam. An experience he is still to this day reticent to discuss. He’s also not dead. His honor comes later I guess. Memorial Day was never really about veterans for me growing up…but was again broadened to include all dead relatives regardless what war they didn’t fight in.
In my life so far I have only lost two people who I was close to. My mother’s mother, and my father’s father. Of course I have known others who died…but these were the only people I was real close to. I was a pallbearer in both. My grandmother died of stomach cancer and weighed maybe eighty pounds at the time of her death. Myself and five other older men easily carried her coffin, like the wind, to her final piece of real estate. My grandfather was much heavier. His ground is also much colder. I also have one niece and two nephews buried next to him. I can’t say I was close to them. They never saw the outside of their birthing rooms. I’m still very angry about that. I can’t imagine how my sister feels.
In the brilliant words of Albert Camus “Grief is Vanity.” It’s true. It’s also intimate, and beautiful. It’s the truest part of ourselves. Like anything, it’s easy to exploit. It’s the easiest way to garner attention. That I believe does not falsify it. Grief is pain is beyond nature.
Scars and Trophy’s share the same purpose.
About Ten years ago I read a series of books that I enjoyed. The first three Dark Tower novels by Stephen King. I have always loved the works of Stephen King and held him as probably my favorite contemporary author. He has a bit of a problem with endings now and then, but he weaves a hell of a tale. When the Fourth Gunslinger book came out I read through that one pretty quick as well. I never loved them. I thought they were pretty engaging, and fun, but in my mind he’d done better. Now with the promise of the final three coming out within the next year I’ve decided to read them all again. I am in the middle of the third one right now. Boy has my mind changed. The intricacy and subtlety of these novels boggles my mind. At first glance they are pretty good stories, but then one looks deeper, and you begin to realize that 95 percent of his novels (if not all in some way) make reference too, or are influenced in some way by the Universe created in The Dark Tower. What an amazing accomplishment of literature this is, and I think will become when it is all over. God Bless Stephen King. It’s all bigger than it appears.
I love to read. I read every day. I read volumes of fiction, non-fiction, papers, commentaries, plays, and anything else I can get my hands on. I feel like I don’t read enough. I don’t have enough time in my life to read all that I want to. I also dog ear pages. I know that many consider this blasphemy. I myself do not. I love a book that looks like it’s been read. A book with Character. A perfect looking book was never meant to be read, just displayed. To me it’s not about what the book looks like, but what it contains. Of course that’s just me. The story will last millennia beyond the lifespan of the pages anyway. I do think that the printing press was man’s greatest invention. I thank God I have the capacity to read. To write. To communicate with whomever may stumble on this little bit of blathering. To grieve, and to heal. To share with you, my friends, my self. I love all of you.
I hope everyone has enjoyed their “worship the dead” weekend. Memorial Day was originally intended to honor the fallen soldiers from both sides of the civil war. Later it was broadened to include veterans of all wars. I am close to only one veteran. My father served a tour in Vietnam. An experience he is still to this day reticent to discuss. He’s also not dead. His honor comes later I guess. Memorial Day was never really about veterans for me growing up…but was again broadened to include all dead relatives regardless what war they didn’t fight in.
In my life so far I have only lost two people who I was close to. My mother’s mother, and my father’s father. Of course I have known others who died…but these were the only people I was real close to. I was a pallbearer in both. My grandmother died of stomach cancer and weighed maybe eighty pounds at the time of her death. Myself and five other older men easily carried her coffin, like the wind, to her final piece of real estate. My grandfather was much heavier. His ground is also much colder. I also have one niece and two nephews buried next to him. I can’t say I was close to them. They never saw the outside of their birthing rooms. I’m still very angry about that. I can’t imagine how my sister feels.
In the brilliant words of Albert Camus “Grief is Vanity.” It’s true. It’s also intimate, and beautiful. It’s the truest part of ourselves. Like anything, it’s easy to exploit. It’s the easiest way to garner attention. That I believe does not falsify it. Grief is pain is beyond nature.
Scars and Trophy’s share the same purpose.
About Ten years ago I read a series of books that I enjoyed. The first three Dark Tower novels by Stephen King. I have always loved the works of Stephen King and held him as probably my favorite contemporary author. He has a bit of a problem with endings now and then, but he weaves a hell of a tale. When the Fourth Gunslinger book came out I read through that one pretty quick as well. I never loved them. I thought they were pretty engaging, and fun, but in my mind he’d done better. Now with the promise of the final three coming out within the next year I’ve decided to read them all again. I am in the middle of the third one right now. Boy has my mind changed. The intricacy and subtlety of these novels boggles my mind. At first glance they are pretty good stories, but then one looks deeper, and you begin to realize that 95 percent of his novels (if not all in some way) make reference too, or are influenced in some way by the Universe created in The Dark Tower. What an amazing accomplishment of literature this is, and I think will become when it is all over. God Bless Stephen King. It’s all bigger than it appears.
I love to read. I read every day. I read volumes of fiction, non-fiction, papers, commentaries, plays, and anything else I can get my hands on. I feel like I don’t read enough. I don’t have enough time in my life to read all that I want to. I also dog ear pages. I know that many consider this blasphemy. I myself do not. I love a book that looks like it’s been read. A book with Character. A perfect looking book was never meant to be read, just displayed. To me it’s not about what the book looks like, but what it contains. Of course that’s just me. The story will last millennia beyond the lifespan of the pages anyway. I do think that the printing press was man’s greatest invention. I thank God I have the capacity to read. To write. To communicate with whomever may stumble on this little bit of blathering. To grieve, and to heal. To share with you, my friends, my self. I love all of you.
